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Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Your Man Was Raped!



Where I live, I see young men that are obviously gay. Everyone wants to know why so many young males are gay these days.

Last year, Oprah had Tyler Perry on her show and he revealed that he had been molested by 4 different people(three men and a woman) when he was a little boy. Oprah did a follow-up show with 200 men who had also been molested as young boys.  Because of society's homophobia, many men feel isolated and never seek help. 

In Western society, man are raised to deny and mask their emotions.  Man-up! This is a common command toward men who appear to be "too sensitive."  When men can't be real about what is going on with them, this can be an open door to anger issues.  Men who act out their abuse through anger typically end up in the criminal justice system.  Other ways men mask what happened to them is to deny it and try to medicate through drugs and alcohol.  Some will end up having to obtain psychiatric help as a result. Worst case scenario is suicide.

We constantly are bombarded these days with stories about young women that were molested as children, but so have young boys. Those boys grow into men. They keep it a secret--then get into relationships. His behavior is strange, but typically, a woman will just assess that he's having a bad day. Well, those bad days grow into weeks, then other things begin to manifest in the relationship.

Your man was raped as a child. And now you're pregnant with his child.

How do you confront something as this. You know you love him, but can you get past this dirty little secret?

(Open discussion encouraged)





Wednesday, June 22, 2011

10 Ways To Build A Strong Family...



Family is the foundation of society. Family is our rock. In the world today, we are constantly bombarded with images that promote everything except what builds strong families. I thought I'd take some time today
and create a list of 10 ways to build a stronger family:

1. Put God first in your family and home. God created family as the first instituion. We should always honor it.
2. Give Support. Don't wait to be asked for help--GIVE IT willingly. Lend a helping hand with a smile. Encourage those who are down.
3. Be Kind. Do you smile when you see your loved ones? What do they see in your eyes? How do they feel after you leave?
4. Be Truthful with one another. Trust is a necessary component of ALL relationships.
5. Show solidarity. ALL for one--and one for ALL.
6. Do unto your family as you would have them do unto you. Service begins in the home.
7. Practice family cooperation. Build a CORPORATION. Invest in each other and build wealth together.
8. RESPECT YOUR FAMILY! No disrespect should be tolerated from within or outside the family.
9.  Keep in touch. Never use distance as an excuse for not communication.
10. Be Available. Stop being so busy and give your family your undivided attention.

No family is perfect, but when you practice these things consistently, you;ll soon discover how much joy will come into your lives.



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Saturday, June 18, 2011

What Happened To Good Music?

Motown Changed the game back in the sixties.  The roster of artists on that label set the record industry on fire.  Than, through the seventies, great artists and songs really gave that decade a virtual soundtrack.  I still listen to seventies music.  The eighties birthed Hip Hop, Madonna and Michael Jackson Thrilled us into the history books.  The nineties kept it rolling with the great young R & B groups, rappers began to become more mainstream and we saw the emergence of Gangsta Rap--giving us groups and artists like NWA, Public Enemy, Paris, Snoop Dogg, Tupac, Ice Cube, Bone Thugs-N-Harmony, The Wu Tang Klan, The Notorious BIG, et al.  From the beginning of the decade to the last nano second of 1999; the nineties thrilled us well.  But the last ten years just have not been very impressive.




There was a time when I would literally toss and turn in anticipation of getting to either Sam Goody, Camelot Music, Tower Records, Coconuts, etc. From R & B to Pop, I had picks. My musical taste is wide.


But those days are long gone.

I moved to Georgia in 2004 and I've only bought about 15 new Cd's within that time frame. Just 15. Honey, I used to buy that many Cd's in one trip to the record store back in the day. In a year, don't even ask. I spent a lot of money...and don't even get me started on stereos, boom boxes, Cd players et al. The Record industry was making a lot of money from folks like me.

However, today, nothing that I hear on the radio these days even get a ripple of excitement out of me. With exception to R. Kelly's Love Letter, J Moss--Just James and the new goal of purchasing Ledisi's new album; I'm really not going to buy too much music.

It's sad...but the glory days of New Music Tuesday are a thing of the past.

Napster changed the game forever. People simply got tired of spending over $20 for music, but only to be disappointed for the lack of good songs on it.



If it continues like this; music stars will be a thing of the past.



Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Why Are Women So Quick to Live With Men That Never Marry Them?





Every time I meet someone, they are always surprised that I live by myself. Why wouldn't I? I just don't believe in co-habitation and my mother always told me that once a man lives with you; he'll never marry you.

Women want to debate that marriage doesn't mean anything and it's just a piece of paper. Well, that piece of paper is a contract. Meaning...a marriage is bound to its terms; enforceable by law. The Bible refers to a man and wife as "of one flesh", wives are "entitled." You are his next of kin and anything that he owns and vice versa, is transferred. Girlfriends only get screwed and disposed of.

Do what you do, but you get what you settle for in life.

I just don't understand women these days who barely even know a man. OK, you go out on a few dates, hang out and develop affection for one another, but now, six months later, you think it's ok to live together?

Women who settle for this, in my opinion, regardless of the lip service they give; simply don't value themselves, and opt for a piece of a relationship rather than being "honored" by a man and asked to be his wife. He's giving you his name and promising to be committed to you for life--if the marriage lasts. Marriage is what you make it. Both have to contribute fully.

Relationships are treated like Kleenex these days. Just use and toss.

Family is sacred and the foundation of society and all one has to do is just look at the current state of our nation.

Every father wants to walk his daughter down the aisle and properly transfer his greatest love to the man whom he approves and trusts to treat his daughter as he has raised her. A good father teaches his daughter how a man is supposed to treat a woman. Charity begins at home and if a woman wants to be considered a treasure; she must first realize that she is a "gift" to her husband.

Why Should You Consider An Amazon Kindle?



The gadgets that are available today seem to be endless.  I'm an avid ready and I've been contemplating buying Amazon's new Kindle.  Why Should I or anyone consider buying one.  Well, for starters, you can download up to 90,000 titles, listen to books, download newspapers, magazines, current events or blogs wherever we may be, it's lightweight and can be carried in our tote bag, purse or briefcase.  And it's great to travel with.  Who wants to slug a bunch of books around?  It's just more weight to carry. 

Some would say, "Why should I pay $399 for one?  How much would you pay for all the books you read?  Not too mention, buying a lot of books takes up space, so you'd have to invest in a bookcase. 

The Kindle is a great invention and since education is an ongoing process; investing in one can be very beneficial.

Whether we like it or not, technology is changing how we live.

I say...Go buy one.

Here's the link:  www.amazon.com






Sunday, June 12, 2011

Knowledge is power and information is critical.  Consider the source. This has always been a rule when receiving information. Anyone who can control your mind and the way you think, can CONTROL YOU.

However, as relates to Black people in the United States, negative information is not ever questioned by those who report the news, but those impacted by bias reporting and statistical information are damaged in ways that can not be understood in the mainstream.

Crime is universal, however, here in America, the image of the Black male is typically that of a criminal, suspect, drug addict/dealer or violent individual. However, when you put a lens of the recent activity of violent crimes, white males go under the radar. Reporting the truth seems to be subjective as relates to many forms of media.

Statistics are one of the most overused methods of understanding a group. White people love to preface their statements about Blacks with statistics, but anyone who has taken statistical theory can tell you that numbers can do not tell the WHOLE TRUTH and can reflect bias. Did you know that fake news is often reported with a particular agenda? Link: Fake News in the United States and how it being used against African Americans. - Assata Shakur Speaks - Hands Off Assata - Let's Get Free - Revolutionary - Pan-Africanism - Black On Purpose - Liberation - Forum

Racism is the culprit of much of the information reported about Blacks, but the government controls the media and uses misinformation in order to dictate social policy.

Why is negative information always being directed at the Black community? It is deliberate psychological conditioning to make blacks think they are a powerless group through deplorable imagery with the agenda of brainwashing the community into thinking they are powerless to change their condition and must accept white dominance.

This is not a joke.

One of the biggest fears of the White power structure is for Black people to become a cohesive force politically as well as culturally.

I'd say, given the nature of behavior exhibited by some African Americans, it would appear that those who do not commit themselves to educating themselves about what is really going on, can't understand why their lives are not fulfilled. They have been influenced by the media and are made powerless because of it.

The Bible says: For the lack of knowledge, my people suffer.

A truth many don't empower themselves against.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Oprah's OWN Network is Too White!


Today, I prepared for yet another scorcher.  It's going to be around 94 degrees today.  I left the house this morning at 6:39 AM.  It was already humid before 8:30 AM.  

Had a lot on my mind.  I spoke to some of my friends and family on Facebook, then I went to my blog.  The traffic is growing, and I'm attracting some interesting folks.  Had a message from someone claiming to be an FBI agent(ok...)and then I spent time answering some of the guests that have commented on some of my blog entries.

I'm not the type to back down from my opinions and generally, I speak my mind without apology. 

There's been a lot of discussion about Oprah's OWN network.  Everyone has been complaining about the lack of diversity on Oprah's OWN network, but what suggestions would people like to give to her as to the type of programming they'd like to see?

 I do feel that her show is too white and I took the liberty of sending her an e-mail stating so:

Dear Ms. Winfrey,

I don't know you personally, but I watched The Oprah Winfrey Show from the very beginning to the last show.  Also, I was blessed to be part of a live audience taping twice over the years.  
However, the reason I'm writing this e-mail to you is just to speak candidly about your OWN network.  I have a question: What type of shows are you planning for OWN?


Many African Americans have been complaining that your network lacks culture and diversity and why aren't you promoting more African American talent?  Why? This article highlighted this very question: http://www.newsweek.com/2011/01/30/is-oprah-s-network-too-white.html.

As an African American woman, I'd like to see programming that reflects my community--and not through the editing of white producers.  There is simply no excuse as to why African Americans are being "Blacked out" by the media--treating us as if we don't matter.  There are so many young Black men and women making accomplishments, but we never hear about them.

If you want your network to succeed, I highly suggest that you begin to reexamine your standards.

Frankly, I'm getting sick and tired of prominent Black people acting as if there is something wrong with showing White America that being Black is not a deficit--it's an honor.



Respectfully,
[Name]

That's my ten cents.  I anticipate her response.

As for Black America, many are not happy.  I'm tired of people complaining all the time. Be bold and speak your mind to her.  Nothing changes until folks make it happen.

Her email address is
Oprah@Oprah.com . She says she will respond to messages when she can. 

Well... SPEAK UP NOW or forever hold your peace.


I Welcome The FBI on My Blog!



Today, while editing the comments to the blog, I got an anonymous message from an FBI agent.  I read it...and responded.

Apparently, my blog has gotten some attention from White Supremacists and other racists that like to hide behind the computer.

The utter irony that I'm listening to an old dance groove by House music legends, Ten City called "Suspicion."

As an African American, I really am not at all inclined to attract attention from Law Enforcement, but honestly, in the information age; one can't get spooked by the presence of those who are hired to protect and monitor all suspicious activity.

My blog is not a platform of hatred.  It is not one with its creator impassioned by some crazed agenda.  It is not a manifesto.  No.  It is just an open journal of everything I think about on any given day--and if you read it--you do so by choice.  It is honest.  No apologies will be given.  However, if you can handle the truth--The Uppity Sistah gives it out by the pound.

Back to my main point: I have nothing to hide.  And I welcome the FBI to come visit the blog.  Hell, it would be just peachy if The Uppity Sistah can assist our Law Enforcement Brethren in some way.  I hate bad people.

One thing is for sure, I'll never tell a lie.  And who knows...they might just be amused, entertained as well as informed about what real folks actually talk about.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

The Game of Power!


From the beginning; it was about power. The first battle for power took place in the heavens:Lucifer, the highest of the Archangels, became incensed when God called upon all of the angelic forces to bow before his creation--man. Lucifer found this despicable and and refused to debase himself and asked: "a son of fire should be forced to bow before a son of clay?" And thus, the war began. He convinced a third of the angels to join him to overthrow God--all life and heaven's Creator. This was insurrection and as any earthly king would do; God banished Lucifer and kicked him and all of the angels from their heavenly dwelling forever. From the beginning, Christ made it perfectly clear that Satan/Lucifer was the enemy.

This battle is still waging. The great Apostle Paul wrote: That we battle not against flesh and blood, but against powers and principalities of powers." Ephesians 6:12

As relates to us humans, our battle also is related to power. But many human beings don't even understand that they have any power. They wonder why criminals, politicians and the wealthy rule over them? Why? Because the one thing all in those categories realize--it's all about power.

What is power? Wikipedia explains power as a philosophy: Power is a measure of an entity's ability to control its environment, including the behavior of other entities. Power is also defined as "the capacity to bring about change." It takes many forms, comes from many places, and is measured in many ways. Understanding all the varieties of power is essential if one is to understand who has it, who doesn't, and how those who don't have it can get it.

Essays that are useful to read to better understand this complex concept include:

  • Understanding Power - If power were one-dimensional, we could easily agree on who has more and who has less. However, we are often surprised when a seemingly less powerful party holds a more powerful party at bay. This introductory essay discusses both potential and actual power, and the sources and forms of each.
  • Coercive Power - Huey Newton wrote, "Politics is war without bloodshed. War is politics with bloodshed." Though not all politics is coercive, it is certainly one way among others to force people to do what you want them to do, against their will. Though coercive power is sometimes powerful, it usually has a lot of destructive effects, which are explained in this essay, along with the benefits of coercion.
  • Aggression - This essay explores the debate over aggression, and whether it is an instinct, a reaction, or a learned response.
  • Revenge and the Backlash Effect - Most people hate to be forced to do things against their will. Using threats often produces such a large backlash, that more problems are created than are solved.
  • Sanctions - Sanctions are punishments that are used to try to influence other nation-states' behavior. Examples are embargoes and prohibitions from attending international events. The benefits and problems with sanctions are described in this essay.
  • Exchange Power - In simple terms, exchange power means that, "I do something for you, in order to get you to do something for me." However, this simple concept has formed the basis for very complex human interactions, including, for example, our economic system.
  • Incentives - Incentives involve rewarding another party for changing their behavior. Although incentives have been frequently associated with weakness or indecisiveness, they can be an effective approach for changing behavior and resolving conflicts.
  • Integrative Power - Integrative power is the power that binds humans together. Kenneth Boulding calls it "love" or, "if that is too strong," he says, "call it respect." Though seldom studied or discussed, Boulding argues that it is the strongest form of power, especially because the other two forms (exchange and coercive power) cannot operate without the presence of integrative power.
  • Persuasion - Persuasion is the ability to change people's attitudes, largely through the skillful use of language. Martin Luther King's "Letter from Birmingham Jail" is a classic example of persuasion.
What much of the world suffers from is power inequality. Low Power groups are those who are impacted from lack of resources mainly, but also, this can be related to group perceptions, geography, class, and the lack of education Link:http://www.beyondintractability.org/user_guides/third_side/equalizers_why-power-inequality-problem.jsp

 However, I'll assert this more practical understanding of power: when I was in tenth grade, there was a girl in my class named Jennifer. Jennifer seemed to be much older than most of the class--not in years, but the way she talked, indicated that she had a better understanding of what life was all about. That intrigued me. One day, during a break, I overheard Jennifer state to a classmate, "you don't get what you put into life, you get what you take." A light within me went on. I knew she was right about that. Although I never said a word to Jennifer, that girl opened up some serious insight that has lasted in me till this day.

Basically, I have always known one thing about myself: My main objective in all I do is TO GET WHAT I WANT!

And that is the truth ladies and gentleman. This is the nature of ALL POWER. And I highly suggest that if you want to keep what you have--understand that the reason why credit card companies, banks, government, celebrities, politicians, rich people and most certainly ALL criminal entities rule; it's because they understand the Game of Power.

Learn it. And you'll never be a victim a day in your life.



Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Marriage For Me, Thanks...


This will be brief, but just about all of my adult life, I've listened to the negatives from people who are against marriage, and in my opinion, if you're against marriage, you either have a poverty mentality or can't commit to anyone and generally are not trustworthy or dependable.

Most people understand marriage to be the union of a man and woman through a private contract, legally, it means: Marriage… is the civil status of one man and one woman united in law for life, for the discharge to each other and the community of the duties legally incumbent on those whose association is founded on the distinction of sex."- Black's Law Dictionary, dating back to 1891

The Heritage Foundation gives this definition: The benefits of marriage: Marriage is uniquely beneficial to society because it is the foundation of the family and the basic building block of society.
  • It brings significant stability and meaning to human relationships.
  • It remains the ideal for the raising of children.
  • It plays an important role in transmitting culture and civilization to future generations.
Marriage is not merely a private contract, but a social institution of great public value and concern. As social science research and government surveys increasingly show, the decline in marriage since the 1960s has been accompanied by a rise in a number of serious social problems.

Statistically, married couples are much wealthier and happier.

My paternal grandparents were married for 67 years. My grandmother passed away in 2007. However, I saw my grandparents committed to each other--she was my grandfather's best friend. Their love and respect, as well as committment to each other was inspiring.

Marriage is not all roses and you have to work at it for it to be successful as any other thing in life.

Thus, it's marriage for me...

Why should anyone fear the one thing that can bring about the stability that all human beings desire?